Perry goes Puritan

Last week, English teacher Mrs. Cynthia Perry shared shocking news to the GHS community: next school year Perry will not be returning to her classroom here at GHS. Instead, she will be teaching at her dream school, Ye Olde Plymouth Schoolhouse. 

“I look forward to teaching in an environment that supports my interests,” said Perry. “ I feel as though YOPS will be a better fit for my teaching style.”

Perry decided to make the pilgrimage to Plymouth after dabbling in some colonial witchcraft like she had read about in her favorite play, The Crucible. This caused her to see apparitions of colonial inspired author Nathaniel Hawthorne. 

In search of answers, Perry visited the Salem Witch Museum, where she then realized that these visions of Hawthorne were telling her to embrace her inner puritan, rather than succumb to the status quo. 

Perry has since asked to be referred to as “Goody Perry” by students and staff in preparation for her new teaching opportunity. 

She has also begun to enforce “Schoolhouse” rules within her current classroom, including swapping a usual curriculum out in favor of teaching cursive writing on a blackboard in all of her classes. 

At Ye Olde Plymouth Schoolhouse, Goody Perry will be teaching classes such as “Intro to Angry Mobbing,” “AP Witch Assessment,” and “How to Resist Temptation.”

“I am extremely excited to teach new classes next year,” said Goody Perry. “Especially the freshmen course ‘Fire and Brimstone; Surviving Your First Year in Hell.’” 

Goody Perry has also stopped answering emails via Chromebook, as they can be seen as types of witchcraft. Instead, she has been responding through letters carried via carrier pigeon. 

“When Goody Perry told me that she was leaving GHS to teach at Ye Olde Plymouth Schoolhouse, I wasn’t really surprised,”  English department program leader Michael Telles said. “To be honest, I could see this coming from a Mayflower away.” 

This summer, Goody Perry plans to take a “Mayflower cruise,” which reenacts the plights the Pilgrims and Puritans faced while on the Mayflower. She also plans to star in Gloucester Stage Company’s production of the The Crucible, where she will play the pivotal role of Abigail Williams with her husband, Reverend Perry, (formerly known as Mr. Perry) playing the role of John Proctor. 

Goody Perry hopes both of these experiences help further her understanding of puritanism before taking on her new teaching role.